He asked me to marry him a year and a half later in our apartment surrounded by seven hundred candles

I met Spencer upstate on Memorial Day weekend five years ago. I was near the Catskills visiting a friend and he was sitting out front when I drove up. Later I drove him to the market and we made eye contact in the rear view mirror the whole time. That was pretty much all it took. I loved him right away.




On our first date he took me to dinner at the Palace Hotel in midtown. It was fancy and fun and felt very "other era". There was a decorative red English phone booth across the street from the hotel that we ended up kissing in. Since Spencer is English I thought he planned the whole thing, but he swears it was just chance.


He asked me to marry him a year and a half later in our apartment surrounded by seven hundred candles. A month later we got pregnant. My first trimester was rough and didn't leave me much energy for wedding planning, so we had a quick civil ceremony when I was five months along.



When our son was ten months old, we officially had a wedding at our cabin upstate. It's a large property that was once a summer camp and it's gorgeous. Huge and wooded and grassy with tons of sculptures and shrines and swimming holes and waterfalls. My best friend Dawn got my wedding dress from the basement thrift store of a church upstate. It was stuffed in a black garbage bag and cost her ten bucks! Total departure from the earthy, vintage vibe I was going for, but I loved it.



So on Saturday we had a barbeque. Everyone was jumping on the trampoline and taking boat rides and bobbing for apples and getting their faces painted. The weather was stunning, totally crisp, bright and clear. I remember the warmth of the sun on my arms and the halo of sunshine around everyone's silhouettes.


Since my father died in 2005 I had my younger brother walk me down the isle. The chuppah was handmade by my friend Carrie, who also did the flowers. We hired the Raya Brass Band, a self-described "exuberant Balkan from Brooklyn" to play at our wedding reception. It’s all a blur, but I think he played drums and accordion.




The cake was made by a baker in Hudson; basic white with whipped cream and fresh fruit. Simple, delicious and light. There was a ton of dancing. Spencer and I were bounced around on chairs. The men were dancing in squatted low positions ala Fiddler on the Roof. There was a lot of kicking, spinning, sweating and hysterical laughing.